The desire to succeed is within all of us, but have you developed the mindset for it. Are you tough enough and ready to weather the storms of life?
You might ask me how, it is a simple word that belies the complexity behind: Toughness or more accurately your capacity for toughness. Toughness is an internal capability to handle stress and the resultant anxiety, to rise from your ashes and perform at consistent levels under pressure.
Being tough is not a fluke that we are born with, it is a combination of self-belief, self-esteem, resilience, motivation and focus. Being mentally tough is a trait you can imbibe, you can learn and you can train yourself to be. Your battle is within.
Self-belief, confidence and self-esteem go hand in hand to make you the person you are, if you believe you can achieve it then it is likely you will achieve it. Although these might sound like motivational posters, but self-confidence is the one thing I wish upon all of you. Whenever you sell yourself short or don’t even attempt because you think you can’t, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. If you make little to no effort and don’t succeed, this failure is not personal, it is a failure of self-belief. Believe in yourself, unshakeable belief that you can achieve your goals, and make a positive self-fulfilling prophecy.
“Barn’s burnt down…Now I can see the moon”, in this poem, Japanese poet Masahide beautifully expresses resilience and optimism. How you view your challenges is the battle half won, how can you view a potentially stressful situation in a more acceptable and less scarier way? Well you just need to see that all is not lost, what is the worst that can happen and even then it’s not over. Exchange your negative thoughts, leave your self-doubts behind you.
A common mistake is to confuse aggression with toughness, simply screaming does not make you tough. In fact you would be surprised that people with the most volatile tempers are the most vulnerable ones too. Success cannot be made on brittle building blocks that would crack on one big emotional blow, it is made on sound and mature responses.
Responses that strip away pride and ego and force you to see clearly within yourself to find your own defenses, to see what motivates you, and brings you joy. If you have the desire, the motivation to succeed, you will reach out and learn these traits. Motivation and focus cannot be forced onto you, it is something that grows in you, that you harness and reign in, when needed.
Self motivated individuals are the ones to look out for, your efforts toward self-growth is what separates you from the crowd. You will find ways to improve yourself, like reading articles like this one or attending workshops.
Being tough helps you be successful in the long run, professionally and personally.
Character traits like accepting failure but not giving up or an internal desire to be better rather than being motivated by keeping up appearances is what makes your success sustainable.
Human beings are adapting creatures, we adapt to new places, new people, new environments, and we adapt to unforeseen roadblocks of our life. It is said that like an ant that can carry 250 times its weight, we can do 250 times more than we think we can. Toughness is what helps you achieve more than you dreamt of, it helps you achieve your potential for the extraordinary. Just like any new skill, mental toughness is something you can cultivate, you can work your way towards being mentally stronger.
One example you can take are football players, the biggest and most revered players in the world do not give up on a match no matter how big or small till the match has ended. They try for one last goal till the last second, their perseverance and hard work of years pays out in one 90 minute match. If they do win or lose a match, the greats will either express joy or disappointment and then move on to their next performance of 90 minutes. Behind each game is hidden years of accumulated experience, aggregated incremental growth, hundreds of risks that resulted in both failures and successes.
You too can be like a Ronaldo or Messi for your own life, start building your own blocks of mental toughness to achieve success in every sphere thought out your life.
Jasmin Waldmann is a well renowned international Life Coach. She guides people of any age, occupations, gender or nationality to work on their charisma, inner balance, guide how to become more successful and boost mental and physical health – and this counts for business and private life. Jasmin helps in a team-character way to a life full of joy and satisfaction.